Family.

Last night I talked to my first cousin on the phone for hours.

This is not in and of itself a remarkable thing. Jason, for example, talked to two of his cousins yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that.

But I haven't talked to my cousin, or any members of my family outside of our nuclear unit, since I was 10 years old.

Having a child forces you to think about a lot of things that could otherwise be easily ignored. Like what to do when you have baby poop on your hands and you have to sneeze before you have a chance to run to the sink, and what you will one day tell your child about her family and where she came from.

It's a sticky subject, this family thing. Because I have always wanted to find out why I don't talk to my family and who they are, but I care more about my own parents' feelings. Unlike whatever happened in their own families, I know mine is impartible. My mom could borrow every cent of money Jason and I ever earned, never pay me back, move into my house and try to interfere with every aspect of our lives, and, sure, I'd be more than a little annoyed, but our bond is too strong to permanently break. At our worst we've maybe gone a couple days without talking, and even that was too much for my emotional health to withstand.

The topic is too big to write about right now. I hope last night's conversation wasn't a fluke, a reconnection that originated on Facebook and barely extended outside of it. I hope it was just the beginning of figuring it all out, this little thing called family. We talked about having one big, awkward, undoubtedly emotional reunion sometime this summer. And if that actually happens, I can stop wondering where I'll get the material for my first novel.

Talking to my cousin on the phone, a man I hardly know, who's memory is mostly preserved in a picture I remember of him and my sister when they were seven and I was just learning to walk, felt a little bit like stumbling upon a missing link. I don't think I realized just how much I wanted to reconnect until I saw his friend request on Facebook (what did we do before it?).

And my desire to fill Adelyn in on the whole story of her family, not one just in fragments, made me pick up the phone and call.