Thank you.

This is my 204th post. I wanted to write something special about this experience when it hit 200, but honestly I didn't realize it. Probably because I was writing in a 10-minute window of Adelyn napping. It's also probably the same reason I woke up to a BOOT on my car because my parking permit for the apartment complex fell off god knows how long ago and I never realized it.

I started writing this blog about a year ago, a month after I found out I was pregnant. And it's hard to talk about now how not-good that time in my life was, knowing how much I love the result of it. But back when I started this blog I was terrified--and I'm not saying that lightly--about my life and my health and my ability to be a mother.

Along with the support of the people around me, I credit this blog with keeping me sane. There were times that I was working overnight tired out of my mind and taking a five minute break to write was the only thing keeping me going. There were times that doctors were telling me horrible news about my Crohn's and the pregnancy and the thought of writing about it when I got home kept me from melting down. And there were times I was confronted with life-altering questions of what I was going to do and writing this blog kept me just-short of questioning everything.

I never imagined this many people would read this blog. I really didn't. At first I didn't know if I even wanted my parents reading it, because I've been more honest about particular topics on here than I would be if we were talking face-to-face.

Thank you, all of you, who come back here to continue on this journey with me. This blog started as a place for me to vent and it's turned into an important part of my life. The e-mails I've received from women thanking me for what I've written have been among the most rewarding mementos of my life thus far.

So, in honor of Mother's Day--a holiday I cannot believe I'm actually celebrating as a mother--thank you to the mothers, fathers, daughters, strangers, friends and family that have continued to read. Thank you to the women, like me, who never knew they wanted to be a mother but who decided to take it on anyway, terror aside.

If I've learned anything from writing this, especially when I go back and reread all the old posts, it's that along with the very, very bad comes the very, very good.