Goodbye, 2009.

Since I can't get drunk or wear a wild outfit or stay out into the wee hours of the morning this December 31st, I'll go back to the holiday's roots and examine my year. Because it's been a weird one. A game-changing, crazy, intense, challenging one.

Just the highlights: I graduated from college. Jason and I moved in together, in Nashville. I got my first "real" job. Jason proposed. I said yes. I turned 23. Five months after Jason proposed, I found out I was pregnant. And the rest, as you know if you read this blog, has revolved around coming to grips with, preparing for, mourning, and celebrating that turn of events.

Tonight, Jason and I are getting takeout. I'm going to try my hardest to stay awake until midnight. We have The Hangover to watch. I've been trying hard to decide whether or not tonight is the night I allow myself a glass--or half--of wine. (At our anniversary dinner, I decided I was going to order a glass and only drink half, and it was a hard decision to come to. As our waiter was walking us to our table, he asked if we needed a wine list, took one look at my stomach and interrupted himself to say, "Woops, no wine for you!" Needless to say, I lost the courage to ask him for that list, after all.)

To kick off the festivities we cleaned the apartment, which might not sound too fun and sounds even more pathetic when I write it out. But now I get to watch Jason pretend to beat up the vacuum cleaner to appease a barking Louie who's declared it his mortal enemy. And that makes it worth it.