Dr. Brown's vs. Gerber. The battle rages on.

It's amazing the kind of things that enter your vocabulary when you're a new mom. I never, ever, thought I'd have this sort of knowledge about bottles, nipples, gear and baby development. The bulk of my child-rearing experience came from my uncharacteristic year spent as a part-time nanny, and I didn't have to really think about bottles or diapers. (Except the time the two-year-old pooped on the floor.)

We started Adelyn on Dr. Brown's bottles with pumped breast milk and with formula when we had to supplement. Because if you've done any research before you give birth you know these are hailed as the elixir of baby happiness. And, of course, they're a hell of a lot more expensive than their cheaper counterparts. When I had to give up breastfeeding, I stuck with the Dr. Brown's. They were working just fine, and if you're going to go through the guilt of quitting breastfeeding it feels a little better to know that formula is coming in the Rolls Royce of baby bottles.

When Adelyn was about three months old we switched to the level two nipples, as per her ped's recommendation. For a while feeding her turned into the easiest thing ever. Four ounces was gone like that, no spit-up, no fussing.

But the last week or so feeding her has become a battle. She won't eat more than an ounce or two at a time, yet she's demanding to be fed every hour, two at the most.

Then I started looking at the nipple yesterday morning and realized there was a teeny, tiny tear at the hole, meaning Adelyn was getting the milk entirely too fast. (Could this have been the cause of the freak out 911 episode? Geez. A torn nipple! Call 911!)

So yesterday at the grocery store I strolled through my new favorite aisle, the baby stuff--usurping the hair care section for the stop spot--but they were out of Dr. Brown's. Great. So I bought the cheapo Gerber latex nipples, medium flow, and threw in a $1.29 pack of the cheapo Gerber bottles. Feeding her has become such a battle I will try anything.

When we got home I mixed up her concoction and she ate five ounces without blinking an eye. There was not a dribble of spit-up. Not even a dribblet. And this is coming from the girl who routinely spits-up a third of her bottle. It did take her a little longer to get the serving down, about 30 minutes, but I didn't have to coax her into continuing to eat.

I was so excited I'm surprised I didn't buy some Gerber stock. I immediately called my friend Candice (also a new mom) to tell her about my discovery. She's been going through the exact same ritual with her daughter, who's 3 weeks younger than Addy.

All this time the perfect bottles could have been costing us $3! I thought. And once again I fell prey to the new-moms-are-so-scared-they'll-buy-anything marketing ploy!

But of course the riddle didn't end there. That would have been too easy. Later that night it started taking way too long for her to get even an ounce down. These nipples weren't cutting it. So I took a Dr. Brown's nipple (after making sure it wasn't torn) and put it on the Gerber bottle. And that seemed to work just fine. For now.

Back to the search for the holy grail.